My life

Attended the talk organized by MOE the other day. It made me realized how lucky I am to be given the scholarship. Government spend approximately 170,000 on my education. That is a lot of money!!! My love for this country is strengthened by this generosity. What other country spend this much money on its people? Not just that, MOE gives scholarship to all not just the brilliant ones. It saddens me however that some scholars do not appreciate this golden opportunity and wasted their time overseas. Getting mediocre grades and returning with an ego comparable to Haji Bakhil.

There was this Cardiff girl who was outspoken during the talk. She said that MOE should be more strict on the selection of scholars as she had this assumption that anyone who achieve third class grade during first year, they are bound to achieve the same grade throughout their university year. I disagree. You previous grades doesn't dictates your future performance. It never will. To assume such thing is nothing but ignorance. For a woman who took BA in communication, her choice of language was very disappointing. I can't remember the exact word she said but its either 'butt' or 'ass'.

Another subject was brought during the talk was regarding change of course. Why would anyone want to change their course? A guy said that some realized their dream just a little bit too late. Similar girl opinianated that there is a lack of guidance in school. I believe that there is one reason for this to happen. This people don't have any visions/goals for the future. I know what I want to do since form 5. I don't need guidance. I did research on my subject. Taking all things in consideration.

My choice of subjects during A level was weird but it served me well when all Universities in my UCAS application accepted me (Both CO and UO). You don't need counselors to tell you what you want to do. You know what you want to do. During the interview process, we were told to write down our study plan. I believe that what you wrote there was a rough plan towards your end goal. Unless you were writing bull, there is no need to change your course.

Then how come intelligent people like XXXX changed their course? Just because you got straight As in your exam doesn't mean you are intelligent in making your choices. I knew some people who excel far better than me but when comes to getting what they want in life, they're clueless. To all potential scholars, before you even apply for scholarship, create a goal in life. Ask yourself what do you want to be after graduating from university. Do a thorough research on your subject. Trust me, as long as you have a meaningful vision to achieve you will never feel miserable.


Its almost a week now since I adopt the now mentality. It felt so good. Happy and always be happy. Toy hunting today. Where can I find Ironman or Teen Titan action figure? Perhaps I should buy the Ben10 watch. According to lunar calendar, Ramadan is this Monday. I'm betting a post on Monday.

Have a nice day.

3 days of happiness. That felt so good. There was that moment of worries but it lasted for 2-5 minutes. Maybe I should see a shrink. There is a possibility that I may suffer from mild depression. Regardless, I am enjoying every waking moment of my life now. Everything is so beautiful. Its a bliss to really enjoy now. Euphoria. Heaven. Contentment. Of course, I still visualized the goals , dreams, hopes but that is only to give me the motivation. No longer I used my imagination to make me feel good because at present moment everything is good.

There are certain things in life that annoys me. Obviously I need to react positively towards this nuisance things. But it would be better if these things are not produced in my presence. So in any social gathering I would be very happy if people would:

1. Not say "buiiii" in front of me. I don't mind you saying it to others but not in front of me. I cringed everytime people doest that. Its even freakier when a woman starts to talk that way.

2. Asking me the obvious. Example:


Hmmmm....only two? They should be more. Actually I just want to write down the number 1. Ended up with two. Anyways, I gave the wrong name to the puppy, its a she not a he. So was thinking the perfect name (Unless my cousin already gave it a name since she's feeding her) and come up with Sheila. hoho. Nice name for a lost puppy. Maybe I should called her Leila.

Later I talked to her and ask her "What name do you want?". Talking to animals, flowers , etc is a good form of theraphy. They agree to everything I say. Best of all, they don't give feedback.


All they did was wriggle. haha

Why am I saying this? Well, I watched Last Holiday on HBO and it made me realized that I am not living at this moment but I am living in the future. Make sense? I got this beautiful, amazing future life inside my head. The glamorous life (yes, I am an attention hunter everyone is), the luxurious cars, etc. I admit, it does make me feel good but then that feeling is short lived. A storm of depression would hit me when I put my feet back on the ground. Fear of not attaining those fantasy is enough reason to put me on the door of depression. So I have decided to live at this moment, to stop thinking about the future.

The future is coming whether I like it or not. I should have set up goals and concentrate on todays work so I can achieve those goals. But all this while, I set goals and live the fantasy in my head without realizing that I invest too little energy at present moment. It struck me how much energy I could have invested now which will help me attain those goals.

By this time, I should have already be able to speak Japanese but I still haven't because I was living in the future. Imagining myself talking with (name disclosed), writing this blog in both Japanese and English. The law of attraction says I need to imagine as if I own all that I wanted. However, the energy used for imagining and action is imbalance. I am feeding my imagination with too much energy!!! So now I vowed to live life now. I started this morning and it was hard but I think I managed. This act of living now made me:


They could be more but I cant intuitively pick up the right words to describe those feeling.

At this moment, I feel happy. I want to be happy till the day God decides to separate this soul from its vessel. I want to reach a state where happy is the only emotion I know. Yes, I do get angry but I will try my best to make that anger melt in a sec.

I also learned another valuable lesson today, I can't control what people want to do, but I can control how I react to them. I will react with the happiest response I can come up with. If you see me giving you the worst kind of treatment, ask me for a dollar. No kidding. I pay you for that mistreatment. That is no joke. A dollar for me being rude to you.

With that said, did you know I need to drink at least 8 litres of water a day instead of 8 glasses of water? General rule, for every 13kg of your weight you need to drink 1 litre of water. Weird right? Got this from a diet book. Lisyah is not on a diet. He is on a healthy indulgence. : )

1. The lost puppy is so cute. I think I should give it a name. Lets call him, Ben. I still haven't got the opportunity to take pictures. When I was about to take it, father came home. I cannot take pictures when his around. I've decided to feed the puppy a nice meaty meal. Am browsing for can food tomorrow. I should buy the whistle that attracts dog attention. Feeding should take place far away from home. Don't want Ben to get too attach to me.

2. There was a small party at Anis's house. Everyone (People I knew) went home by the time I got there. Positive expectation gives you that feeling of joy when it really happens. However when things doesn't go as expected, you know what happened. Luckily Anis was there to accompany me. Talked about lots of stuffs. I liked the Lamb. Its delicious. Thank you for the invitation.

3. I want to watch Zohan, anyone wants to join?

4. My confidence is misunderstood. Some people thought that am a snob.

5. I got a cool bag from mamah. Im using it during the flight back to Birmingham.

6. I wasn't really helpful yesterday. I don't know what to do. But I am glad that I am useful punching bag for my little cousins.

7. I am amazed that Nini Amit remembered me. The last time I checked he barely recognized me. Yesterday he even asked me when will I go back to Birmingham. I don't remember telling him about me going to Birmingham. I bet mom told him. And he remembered!!! What did he do to make his memory so super again? Anyways, I am happy he remembers. My favorite old Nini is back.

8. What could be the reason for a guy to sent my sister a message in the middle of the night? Is she having a boyfriend? Should I just let her be? Or should I interfere? She is in form 2 and already got the nerve to have a boyfriend. I don't know anyone from my batch who hooked up during form 2 and still together to present date. Love is a funny thing if you think its funny.

1. A lost puppy wandered around our house and is now sleeping under Corolla. I wish I can do something about it. The puppy is cute. I post some pictures if I manage to capture one. Dad joked that its my pup (I wonder what his reaction if he finds out his son loves dog).

2. Cat is carnivorous animal but why did my cousin's cat ate grass??? Is vegan a trend now???

3. I loved my the YP-U4 Samsung Audio player. I want to boast a little bit, according to qqestore employee, I might be the first customer who ordered it. Assuming that qqestore is the only store that is selling it, it is safe to assume I am the first Bruneian to own this wonderful gadget.

4. Brunei Grand Sales starts today until the 5th of October. I cant wait to go back to Birmingham. First item on my shopping list is Loreal Activ White Moisturizer. Second item would be Nugeno. Third would be guitar tuner for my brother. After getting all of that, I would buy anything that fancies me.

5. Its 22.08. Time flies. I still need to qada my puasa. Haven't start yet and don't know when to start. I wonder if I can dual niat (Intention) during Ramadan.

6. No workout during Ramadan. Should have paid monthly instead of full three month. Oh well, whats done is done.

7. Today am tweaking my layout. Hopefully it goes well.

8. Going to Tutong today. Cleaning Grandma's house. This is the time when I wish I have my own personal driver. Can take me anywhere while I rest my eye throughout the journey. Shoot my car is very dirty. Lack the will to summon enough energy to clean it.

I browsed through my collections of self help books and came across an old book entitled The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. I loved this book but had never actually apply the principles presented. In summary, this book discussed the 7 habits that is required for an individual to lead a successful, rewarding life.

I read through the 2nd habit: Begin with the end in mind. At the beginning of the chapter, the author suggested that we should imagine ourselves 1 year from now. I did the suggested exercise and am willing to share with you what I imagined would happen to me on 20.08.2009.


It is ambitious but achievable. Life is meaningful when you have purposes to fulfill. It is sad to see that majority of Bruneians do not have a clue what they want to do in life. Some just want to settle down as soon as finish college. Some just want to make lots of money. Some just want to embrace whatever life gives them.

Having no goal in life could be the reason why some people failed in their life. They don't have enough reason to live for it in the first place. To just follow the wave would either bring you to a very nice beach or a very bad ones. Some people told me that "Its fate". This what amuses me, anything that is good is hard work and anything that is bad God's doing. What a lame excuse to hide your own incompetency!! Admit that you lack the capacity to live life the fullest. Admit that you are stupid. And when you begin to accept this, do something about it. Don't just sit and relax, do something!!!!




Find a quiet place and think for a minute or two how would you want to see yourselves one year from now? You should be able to think what sort of things you can do now to get to that 'one year later' you. Trust me, this will really help you become an effective person. And after that, write it down. Put it on paper, make it as your wallpaper, put it somewhere you can see it, etc. I write it down in front of my personal diary, so the moment I open my diary, I see those goals. : )

And before you do something stupid, ask yourselves will this action help me achieve my goals? If yes, go for it, if no, you know what to do. See, simple right? Don't need to use astrology or feng shui to help you get what you want.

Went to Body Combat last night. A black guy was instructing the class. First impression, he knows what he is doing and he wants everyone to do the same thing. 30 minutes before the class ended, he taught us the right techniques so that we can enjoy the class more. He explained the specific muscles targeted during the exercises. He greeted everyone and treated everyone the same. And he did the class at the right speed so everyone can followed him. Wu chun, hire more people like him.

Woman who can't control their hormonal imbalance should not work in places that involves interacting with people. Its an insult to me to be given the most unfriendly smile last night. I smiled to Michelle and I got back what could be the worst fake smile ever. A friend told me that he disliked Michelle because she's a bitch. I begin to agree with him, but not on the bitch part just the dislike part. Or maybe I am wrong, maybe she can't smile because she got botox all over her face. I should just skip her class forever. Her class doesn't help me achieve my goal but instead create unnecessary resentment towards her.

Went from one blog to another blog. I found out that Mr. Tony, Ms. Eena. Ms. Yani and Ms. Huda (So weird using this formality) are going back earlier than planned. Actually, I was thinking the same thing right from the first day I arrived in Brunei. Reasons:

1. So afraid of my results. When results came out, everything is good. I called my father and told him (without really thinking) am going back on 5th October. Then later that afternoon he confirmed my flight with RBA.

2. House hunting. Need to find a new place to stay. My room so small. Initially I am fine with it, said to myself good for studying. Later I realized that my room in Brunei is big, making my UK room like an amah (Maid) room. Wait even maids got bigger room than mine. I can take Sepol's room, but the height is too short. Not nice for tall man like me.

I had this thought in my head "What if my current housemates doesn't want to move out?" (Later during our ambuyat gathering, confirm that they really don't want to move). So I asked advice/advise (am confuse between these two words, Mr. Alan mentioned the difference but I couldn't remember just how to use them) from my parent, my cousins and my friends, told me this " Its your decision, you're the one who pays the rent". This is my plan, and may subject to change:

a. I am considering living in halls. Its time to walk the talk. I've been advocating living in halls but never actually live in it. First choice, Lakeside residence. If Can't find lakeside, say bye bye halls. Or maybe just the standard halls, ask for the disabilities room (Have toilet). Tell them I got varicose vein, need short distance to bathroom. lol. As if they stupid enough to believe that.

b. Living with Ms. Vain. You know who you are. I've been online hunting for two rooms, lots of good apartments. But the price tag is just too good to be true. Get it? Maybe three rooms house with one international student should be ok. Hot asian chick (Japanese/Chinese). Guy also can for Ms. Vain personal indulgence. Must be somewhere in the middle between Aston and Birmingham University. I opt for grant management services.


Everything will go as plan. I know it will.

So why then I decided to stick with 5th October:

1. Cause a s friend is going back on the same day. His my shadow or maybe I'm his shadow. Regardless, at least on airplane I got somebody to chat with during the long haul flight. Also can ask money during transit in Dubai. The disadvantage of being older. haha.

2. Want to spend raya with my family. Also save money. Later go home, later spending. Besides, parent already invested money into my new baju raya. So consider my stay as a worthy investment. Thinking myself as a portfolio. Haha.

New timetable where are you??? I really need to look at it before applying for any activities. Confidently I will say it will be the same like last year, relax and chill with little work to do but tremendous amount of reading.

Oh am a member of aston anime club. Under the presidency of Ms. Kumi. I want to join aikido club. I should meet Mr. Whatever his name is. He is a lecturer in Aston. The big player in aikido Birmingham. I also must join archery and become the next Legolas. Bankrupt New line cinema if I become Legolas.

Picture from the BBQ: (Lazy to edit except the last pic)

Women Clean your armpits. If anyone out there intends to wear sleeveless (Or whatever the lingo is) please make sure your armpits are clean. Its a huge turn off for me. I suggest buying Nivea whitening armpit product (I don't know the exact name of the product) or if you are financially restricted, buy a body sponge and rub your armpits everytime you go to shower/bath. Never ever wear sleeveless when you know you have a dirty armpit. So women, go to the nearest mirror, lift both of your arms and make sure that your armpit is clean.

Something huge is happening tomorrow. The auspicious day for moslem, Nisfu Syaaban. The famous ritual is the recital of Surah Yassin 3X with three different niyah (intentions). Get yourself a bottle of water and head to the nearest masjid to join the congregation of this blissful ritual. : )

I got an interesting running workout to share with fitness enthusiast. It's not mine. Got this from Arnel.

I switched on Astro and watched the men Gymnast Olympic. One word AMAZING!!!! Their bodies so purrrrfeeecccctttt. I am so envious of them. That is what I called body~~~~ Can just go walk on the street half nude without fear of being ridicule. I wished I have some pictures to show you how purrrfeecccttt the body. But I am too lazy too google for any.

I went to the mirror and pulled up my shirt and thought one or maybe two months till I hope to get at least half of their body. God, Why need to workout to get that body? Can they be any pill that I can pop into my mouth and next day got those abs, chest, etc. Am gonna double my current workout...No triple it. Everyday run, everyday weight lifting.

I hate the Body Jam class yesterday. The moves are boring!!! Michelle mixed some 40 and 4? moves and the end result was disastrous. Its bloody boring. I didn't feel any burning going on. I had to run on the treadmill to make my gym day worthwhile. Hei Wu Chun, can we have Caucasians instructor? Its a good thing you already employed black instructor. (Try to find the correct term, but cant find any, sorry if anyone is offended by the term)

Saw Ho Wee at the gym. The nicest greeting ever "What are you doing here?" Before I can explained, he dashed off to his mates. I was offended but who cares. Perhaps that is his way of greeting friends.

I am really disgusted when someone plays half nude knowing his body is not something 'display' quality. So it happens that two of these type of guys played bball at FZ multi purpose hall. I know the term 'mind your own business'. But its a public place, have some descency (correct my spelling?) for others. We attracting what we see everyday and I don't want those fats in my life.

One organized by Zai and Amal for X-MS (Sunday). The other one organized by Mallie for current BiBers (Monday). I don't have pics from the MS, I forgot to by bring a camera. But I got few from yesterday BBQ.

Hanif and Me Vaining.

Jay the Honorary Guest. (Pardon the name, I think that's his name)

The Guys

The Newly Engaged Lady, Kayun and President Tony

I am really sorry that I couldn't come to your engagement Kayun. My aunt invited me to her nikah at short notice. If I could split my body into half, I would but such feat is impossible. I may also had disappointed certain people. I am truly sorry. It is true when they say that family always come first. I never truly understand the phrase till I experience the situation where I am to choose between my own blood or my friends. Some things in our life we can't control.

For every event there is a reason for it to happen. If I didn't attend my aunt's nikah:

1. I wouldn't know that Yasmin of LufBra is my second cousin. (No wonder I got this feeling I seen her somewhere before.)
2. I wouldn't know that I have a cute nephew.
3. I wouldn't know my second cousin (I think he is my second cousin), Basir is going to UK.


Here some pictures from the Nikah.



I miss Birmingham. I miss the people, the vibrant city and the bus. I miss Uni. Currently I am busying myself with SPSS module. Relearning everything under my research module so that when next term starts, I could play around with new experimental data on my SPSS program. SPSS is hard if you don't master the basics. I can't wait to get my hands on the latest focus program. Observation is fun when you know what you are looking for.

Can I survive with only 40 dollar in 3 weeks? I reduced my purchasing power to just $50. I realized I am a big (Can I not have anything small? Get it?) spender. So in order to control this dangerous impulse, I hide the rest of my money somewhere in my wallet (Yeah, no point right). Let see how Lisyah can handle his finance. Let Lisyah walk the talk. Oh yeah, belated birthday shout outs to:

It may be a coincidence or it may be intended. I recall watching a Japanese show where women from the audience were selected to perform oral sex on stage. They really enjoy doing it on live tv.

This article is taken from brudirect:

A decomposed body of a man covered with maggots and believed to be set on fire was found by villagers who were collecting ferns at Simpang 124-122 in Kg Selayun, Sengkurong Tuesday evening, police said yesterday.

SAC Peng Eng Lee, Director of Criminal Investigation Department (CID), said that Sengkurong Police Station received a call at around 9 pm Tuesday evening stating that some villagers had found skeletal remains in Spg 124-122 Kg. Selayun.

The road where the decomposed body was found is the site for rubbish.

When police arrived at the crime scene, they found a partly burnt body. Early experiment by pathologists showed that the body could have been dumped about three to four days ago.

The Special Investigation Unit of the CID is carrying out an investigation.

"It's the remains of a man. The lower part of the body is still with flesh while the upper part is decomposed as the skull and bones are visibly seen.

"The villagers who found the body were overcome by the foul smell while collecting ferns. The place is now being cordoned off,” SAC Peng added.

The police are also urging the public to contact the nearest police station if they have any missing relatives or friends.

I wish Brunei have a Special Forensic Unit. In this age of information, experience is useless when not accompany with the right knowledge. Police Department should consider hiring people with greater level of qualification or hiring people with the right skills. They should do what Ministry of Defense is doing, sending scholars abroad. I don't know the authenticity of this story but it is worth a read.

A UBD graduate applied for the police force few years ago but was rejected. Later it was found out that he was too good for the applied post. Some even conclude that his brilliance may threatened the position of senior officers if he was enrolled to the force.

True or not its up for you to decide. I am surprised that my aunt is ending her bachelor life today. I am torn between Kayun engagement and my aunt's wedding. If only I can teleport.

Adik Lisyah with Kaka Ayun

President Tony and Sepol

Mallie and Hanif

Shuhir and Hjh Diyana

Attach errrr........thinge on aircond

I don't like people sleeping on my favorite sofa (Even though its not mine) especially if that someone is known for possessing a very nice body odor. I knew that the sofa would contract a very pungent scent. I went to Hua Ho Tanjung Bunut and bought this:

I sprayed the sofa but the odor remained, the odor of a sweaty armpits. I sprayed again and again until the odor disappeared. I used 1/4 of the bottle , this proves that that someone should really take a very long shower with lots of Palmolive Soap.

Last night was a very memorable night. Bumped into Leeyana at DQ Tanjung Bunut. She looked exhausted. UBD new academic session started yesterday. Aston starts on the 6th of October, and I already started my statistics reviewing session. I can't wait for second year to start.

Met Adek, a friend thought his cute. Usually I bullied her for her lack of taste in man but this time she might right. So we talked and updated. Went to his house for dinner. Firda was the cook of the night. His black pepper lamb and chicken soup were delicious.

I am really stingy you know and very indecisive when comes to things that involve money. I did mentioned few weeks ago that I planned to travel this month. I am holding back again. I got lot of things going on in my mind right now. Haven't lay out any plans for this month yet. Possibilities are: